Donald Trump Is One Day Away From Claiming Biden Used Witchcraft to Reclassify the Documents He Claims He Declassified

donald trump famously spent his time in the White House saying and doing things that elicited the reaction, “Donate this man’s body to science so we can figure out what’s wrong with him as soon as possible.” He’s suggested to trade the US Puerto Rico for Greenland; claimed that noise could give you cancer; told people Melanie Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un were close personal friends, although the two had never met; quarreled publicly with a dead man; reiterates that he was named Michigan Man of the Year, an honor that doesn’t exist. This series of stupidities obviously goes on and on. But last night Trump added another to the list that would arguably put everyone else to shame given the madman’s depths.

Asked in an interview with Fox News’ Sean Hannity Referring to his “trial” to release the government documents the FBI seized from Mar-a-Lago – which Trump insisted on without evidence last month – the ex-president replied: “It doesn’t have to be a trial like mine understand [to declassify]…if you’re the President of the United States, you can break the secrecy just by saying it’s broken, even if you think about it…there may be a process, but there doesn’t have to be.”

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To be clear, this is Donald Trump claiming he declassified top secret documents with his mind which has the difference that it’s both crazy about batshit and not how any of it works, which people who know what they’re talking about were quick to confirm:

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Since the FBI raided Mar-a-Lago on Aug. 8, Trump and his allies have repeatedly insisted he declassified government documents they uncovered, but when the special master appointed to his case asked Trump’s attorneys this week for actual evidence of asked for the alleged release, they refused to provide any. To put it bluntly, if the ex-president had released the information – and again, former Trump administration aides insist this never happened – he would not have been able to do so by really, really thought hard. Is it completely crazy that we even have to say this? yes yes it is

Just before the interview aired on Fox, Trump suffered a major blow when the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals sided with the Justice Department and ruled that the FBI could use classified documents recovered from Mar-a-Lago in its criminal investigation . Previously a federal judge Aileen cannon had thrown a bone at the ex-president and prevented prosecutors from using those documents until a review by a special master was complete. In a move that will no doubt lead to a skewed series of posts on Truth Social, a three-judge panel called bullshit about Trump’s declassification claims, writing, “The plaintiff suggests he may have declassified these documents when he was president. But the record contains no evidence that any of those records were released. And before the special master, the plaintiff refused to provide evidence that he had released any of those documents.” It then went on to say that even if Trump had released the information, it wouldn’t matter anyway because it was government property, not his . “In any case,” the decision states, “the declassification argument is, for these purposes at least, a red herring, since declassifying an official document would neither change its content nor make it personal.” While Trump’s allies have no doubt already hatched some conspiracy theories about that Because the appellate courts’ judges are part of the “deep state,” the panel consisted of two judges appointed by Trump, with the third appointed by Barack Obama.

Trump’s attorneys could still take his case to the Supreme Court, and given that SCOTUS is dominated by conservatives, three of whom Trump has appointed himself, that’s a worrying prospect. Then again, the judges have ruled against him in the past, and as they say, a broken beer bong twice a day is right.

The appeals court ruling wasn’t the only legal blow Trump has suffered this week, of course. On Wednesday, New York Attorney General Letizia James announced a massive lawsuit against the ex-president, several of his adult children and his company, alleging years of “harrowing” fraud. Trump has not yet said whether he has retrospectively legalized all alleged crimes in his own head canon, but a statement from his attorneys may be forthcoming. Donald Trump Is One Day Away From Claiming Biden Used Witchcraft to Reclassify the Documents He Claims He Declassified

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