Odds and Ends: Dedicated to Subway sandwiches and other offerings

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WOULD YOU CHANGE YOUR NAME FOR UNLIMITED SUBWAY?

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Eat fresh for a lifetime. But there’s only one catch.

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You must give up your government name and change it to “Subway”.

That’s what the Submarine sandwich chain is hoping you’ll do to prove you’re their number one fan in their latest marketing campaign. Last week people had a chance to visit the site SubwayNameChange.com to enter a contest where, if selected, they would legally have to change their first name to “Subway”.

“Subway Jones” has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?

According to the news agency WFLAthe lucky winner, who loves sandwiches, will receive $750 in cash to cover the cost of the legal name change and $50,000 in Subway gift cards.

That’s a lot of sandwiches.

“SHCOOL” IS COOL IN HOLDEN, MA.

As Homer Simpson once said as he burned his high school diploma, “I’m so smart. SMRT!”

Spelling mistakes are common in essays and book reviews. On a public road, that’s questionable.

The city of Holden, Massachusetts laughs at its mistake after writing the word school in paint “shcool” on a street near Mountview Middle School. The typo on the street was spotted in late July and according to the city’s Facebook page, it’s well aware.

““We are aware of the typo on the road near Mountview School and notified the contractor shortly after the error occurred two weeks ago,” he said the post. “Due to recent weather conditions, they were unable to return to repaint the text.

“We anticipate the issue will be resolved shortly and are forever grateful for any input on the subject.

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City officials found humor in the situation and released an apparently photoshopped image of the school sign that would bring things back to normal.

“We’re pleased to announce that the city has found a temporary solution to the typo in Mountview’s street paintwork,” read a post, which included a picture of the sign that reads “Mountview Middle Shcool.”

“You’re welcome,” wrote the city.

Florida police don’t care about manatee mating

birds do. bees do. Even large manatees do it.

But police in Pinellas County, Florida, don’t want to hear about it. And they want residents to stop calling them about it too!

People are calling for police to intervene after seeing manatees doing the dirty deed and believing they are in trouble. In a video posted to Facebook by the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office, a group of about a dozen manatees can be seen huddled together in some sort of waterfront orgy while Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” plays in the background.

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“We keep getting calls from citizens when they see this and believe the manatees are in distress,” the sheriff’s office said the video. “We can assure you that they are more than fine.”

The sheriff’s office said manatees mate year-round, but the large herd of manatees is found during the summer months.

“So if you see this, don’t call, they’re fine,” they said. “And remember, touching or disturbing manatees is not only illegal, it can be very dangerous.”

SNAKE FALLS ON WOMAN THEN HAWK ATTACKS HER

A woman from Sisbee, Texas, hasn’t really planned on being attacked by sky-flying animals lately.

Peggy Jones minded her own business and was mowing her lawn on a tractor on July 31 when a snake fell out of nowhere and wrapped itself around her arm.

Jones told Click2Houston.com that she was waving her arms in the air trying to get rid of the snake when a hawk flew down and scratched her arm while fighting for the snake.

The bird tore off the snake and flew away. Jones said she believes the bird attacked her four times while trying to capture the snake.

She left a bloody mess. Jones’ husband took her to the hospital for treatment for cuts and bruises.

“I feel like the luckiest person in the world to have survived this!” said Jones, noting that it wasn’t her first encounter with a snake.

Jones said she survived a venomous snake bite a few years ago.

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